Thursday, June 22, 2006

Un-Clear

Not so fast, Vampdaddy....Think that this is a done deal? All resolved? Roll end credits?

Not quite.

While yesterday was a day of highs, today has been a little low. Vampbaby is still doing amazingly well -- his left side is functioning at a level so close to normal that someone who didn't know about the surgery would never know that anything was wrong. However, this morning they took off the cap that covered his head -- showing his beautiful curly hair, and a scar in the shape of a "Z" above his right ear, as if Voledmort hit him instead of Harry (or Zorro came by and said "hello, baby!"). It will of course heal, and I'm certain that in a few months you won't even see it, but looking at it this morning made this entire experience real for me. It was the concrete reminder of what the last few days have been, what it has meant to us, and what it will potentially mean to our futures. And the emotions that I've been sitting on to get through each day came out, little by little. A good and necessary release, but not one I was prepared for at that moment.

Then there is the growing picture of returning home, and as Morrissey says on his new album, "there is no such thing as normal". The drama isn't finished -- we still don't know what the tumor was, and the fact that it's been more complicated than not to identify it is not necessarily good news (nor bad -- but fear of the unknown rears its ugly head). And, while there won't be any need for future brain surgery (most likely), there is most likely something that will need to be done -- Vampbaby will at least be on anti-seizure medications for a couple of months, and that may be just the beginning.

We are not out of the woods yet, and it is a dark, dense forest filled with uncertainty. So we will do our best to focus on the successes of yesterday, and take the mystery one day at a time.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great to hear that Vampbaby is doing so much better. We are praying and hoping that he continues his remarkable recovery.
Uncle Leo

Anonymous said...

Dear Tym Mel and Deckland too!!! Dorothea, 'Aunt Dotty" ...the other weird one in Tym's family...letting you know I and my family and a wide circle of helping/healing friends have been saying prayers, sending Reiki, and holding intentions and visions of Deckland's perfection in body, mind and spirit! At Summer Solstice at America's Stonehenge, with focus on The Ancestor's, I prayed to all of Deckland's ancestors to bear witness to his complete and perfect healing and recovery. I just heard the happy wonderful news from my brother, Bill/Bob, Deckland's grandfather, that he is going home tomorrow. I will let all those in my healing circle know this good news. Blessings and Much Love, Dorothea/"Aunt Dotty"

Anonymous said...

So glad to hear that Declan is doing so well. Also happy to hear that you and Mel are doing well and that all the prays that are said are helping you and Mel also Declan heal. Take care and I will see you soon.

If there is anything I can do to help please let me know.

Love Aunt Elaine

Uncle Craig said...

Faith can:
~Sustain you on difficult journeys
~give you direction in mazes of darkness
~support you amidst waters of despair
~shed rays of hope through clouds of doubt
~bring courage to banish your greatest fears
~provide sanctuary during times of disaster

-Authored by Uncle Craig
(All rights reserved)

Dear Vampdaddy, Vampmommy & Vampbaby,

May your own faith and the faithful support of all who love you see you through the toughest times in the journey of life.

Sincerely,
Uncle Craig

CountryChick said...

We are so glad to see that you are doing so well little man! I was so happy when I got to hold you today...I think mommy could see I was itching to hug and hold you. I know you have a long road ahead of you, but you are a strong little guy and everyone knows you will pull through. And hey...you'll have a cool story to tell all the ladies to go along with your zigzag scar when you get older!

Anonymous said...

We will all keep positive thoughts! Please give the little guy a big kiss and hug from us.. Love you all so much!!
Anna, John & Family